Life with Ken

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Last week my debut book, “Get Your Mind Right” launched! It’s now available for purchase wherever you buy your books. Visit the book’s website to learn more. The book did not reach bestseller status. It was a long shot but I’m a hopeful person. I set myself up for failure frequently in that way. I want to believe big. I want to hope big things can happen. I am learning that I would rather believe that something amazing can happen and be disappointed, than not believe at all. I would be such a fucking loser if I didn’t believe in anything. Can I curse here? Yeah, it’s my platform…

The Bible says that God has given each of us a measure of faith (Romans 12:3). My measure of faith in part if not in whole is that I believe big things can happen. In my lifetime I would be elated to see a multitude of big things happen to me and those I care about and root for. I don’t know if I can elaborate enough about my inclination towards amazingly wonderful knock your socks off big things happening. I love to see it happen for others and for me.

Part of my desire for large scale positive things to manifest in my life and in the lives of others, is I believe that my God is big. I am not knocking anyone else’s measure of faith. But for context, while someone else can “only” believe that God can help them pay a bill, find a spouse, or get through a difficult time; I believe God can open doors for me that I probably shouldn’t or otherwise wouldn’t walk through. I believe God can put me on a late-night show, on a poster or billboard, on a mainstream media press circuit, on a large stage, in a position to run a large company, give me large influence, a large bank account, and give me the fullness of the lifestyle I want. I think God is big and can do big things. I like big things.

Part of having faith to believe that those kinds of things can happen for me is being let down frequently. My job within that reality is not being discouraged when that happens. Because ultimately it won’t always be that way where I have to accept a consolation prize as opposed to the equivalent of a first-place trophy. It wouldn’t be in me if it wasn’t meant to be fulfilled through me. So, just because this project or the previous one, or the last one, or the one before that, didn’t generate the previously described results I aspire to, doesn’t mean the next won’t; or that my dreams and desires won’t happen for me. The etymology of the word “desire” has Latin roots and means “of the Father.” “The Father” is God. So yes, God put the desire in my heart to desire big things and he will give that to me how he sees fit.

And like I said, if I didn’t believe that what I would be doing instead of penning this article isn’t worth talking about. The other thing to note is that within the context of God’s will, or what he wants to do, you can be aligned with the desire, but not necessarily aligned with the destination or outcome. The same kind of results I was just gushing over can come in a package that I didn’t even describe. It’s possible that God could give me all those things in a completely different package than the one I’m thinking of. This describes among other things, the importance of continuing to push ahead, moving forward, and not giving up on your dreams. Dreams don’t die, people give up on them.

So, while the book launch may not have launched where I believed it could go, doesn’t mean it didn’t defy gravity. I didn’t mean to do a Wicked pun there, but it also just so happens that Wicked the movie came out the same week as my book, so there you go. And you know what while I’m giving shout outs, not that the following people need it, but shout out to Keke Palmer, her memoir came out on the same day as my book. And shout out to Matt Rife who is about to go on a comedy tour. I’m not a big fan of his comedy, but I’ve been following his career on and off and he has a compelling story. I feel good about the book launch, and I believe more success for the book is on its way.

I don’t want to harp on this next point for too long, but maybe there is something in this that you can learn from. I was reminded of something that I learned early in my career, as a salesperson. And that’s that people are full of it. Not all people but as an objective general observation. Part of finding your people is understanding who is just giving you lip service and who is actually willing to put their money where their mouth is. Over my professional career I have encountered a multitude of people who like to talk. Talk is cheap. Talk is cheap from the perspective of it costs a person nothing from their end to rattle off at the mouth. That said there are repercussions to that kind of careless behavior. The trajectory of your life materializes through your words and if your word isn’t good, it’s hard to conceive that your life is or will be that much better.

Not to go on too much of a tangent, but this is why certain people don’t have what they would like, because their word isn’t good. They don’t have good intentions even if they can’t follow through on their word. They don’t know how to not give their word if they know they have a bad track record. All of that comes back on to an individual. I pray that I can be a man of my word. It’s biblical to be a person of your word. I joined a fraternity whose mantra is be a man of your word. Having to work with trifling people like that can be stifling and demoralizing. If I can encourage you, let me say that someone else’s behavior or how they conduct themselves is not your fault.

I am starting to learn more about what it means when people say your network is your net worth. Some people aren’t interested in helping you because they aren’t interested in helping themselves. They like getting high off hope and that’s it. I write about all of this in my book. Don’t get worked up when people try to sell you on BS. Don’t lose your awe and wonder and remain optimistic but at the same time, your existence is too valuable to be played with by someone else. And this doesn’t necessarily mean that people have ill will towards you or are haters, though that can certainly be the case.

But some people just don’t have it in them to be genuine or above board in general or as it pertains to you. You can’t make that your problem. Even though I didn’t like the work in the iteration that I did it in, one valuable lesson that is still prevalent for me today as someone who use to do door-to-door sales, is that you must shift your focus from being upset that someone said no or didn’t follow through in a way that they said they would, to anticipating and being ready to capitalize when someone says yes and follows through on their yes. Those people are your people and that’s the plane you want to operate on if you want to see significant things get accomplished.

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