5 Essentials to a Success Mindset

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Success like everything else comes at a cost. There is obligation associated with recognition. Successful people have responsibility. They must take charge, have a vision, and seize an opportunity. Subjectively, success looks differently for everyone, but objectively, it is made up of the same substance. Success is proper preparation for an optimal opportunity. Here are my 5 essentials to developing a Success Mindset:

1. Hard Work

The most successful people become so not because they are better but because they worked harder. Hard work beats talent when talent does not work hard. Michael Jordan is the GOAT (Greatest Of All Time) in basketball not because he was naturally great which he was, but because of how hard he worked.

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The same has to become true in your own life when cultivating a success mindset. What are your habits? What are your building blocks?

Success is a laid foundation.

I am successful because I built my life around it. That is not braggadocios that is a fact. You develop a success mindset by constantly seeking success. That means being willing to fail every day.

Get “The Pursuit of Passion: How to Sequence your Life for Success” and make success your new normal.

2. Know Your Why

Successful people embrace failure. Failure is an opportunity to grow, not an excuse to quit. Quitting is the only true form of failure. Every time we fall it is our responsibility to get back up. The second way to develop your success mindset is to have a reason to get back up. In business this is called “knowing your why”.

The concept is as simple as it sounds: Why do you do what you do/want what you want. You have to have a reason to get out of bed in the morning, and I hate to break it to you, but money is not a sufficient enough reason. People who win the lottery for example, statistically do not lead better lives, in some cases, their life ends up worse.

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When money is your why, you instantly lose.

Passion reverberates, but Paper is passionless. The only good that comes from money is in how it is used. That is why those same lottery winners tend to go broke within 3-5 years of winning, because all the money in the world cannot buy happiness.

When you know your why you become unhindered by the inconveniences that life throws at you, because you know you are living for a higher purpose. An authentic why should be rooted in one’s true desires because our desires are universal gifts unique to each one of us.

3. Ask for What you Want

People with a well-developed success mindset know exactly what they want, and they act on it. Part of taking action is being willing to ask the universe for what it is you want.

Words have power and by claiming what you want by speaking it out loud, you begin to align yourself with the resources necessary to achieve that goal. I am a businessman and entrepreneur because that lifestyle is my heart’s desire. I work hard at my craft, and I specifically ask God for those type of opportunities to manifest in my life.

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People with a success mindset are also granular about what they want. They can tell you almost every detail about what they want because they see it every day. You must visualize your success before it starts materializing.

Directionless people are helpless people. Imagine being lost in a remote part of the world and your phone dies. Not only do you not know where you are, but you also do not have a GPS to help you find your way. People without vision or direction are the exact same way, lost in their own wilderness.

4. Reassess the People in your Life

An eagle can fly over 10,000 feet in the air. The average bird stays at around 500 feet in the air. People with success mindsets are eagles. In addition to flying high, eagles tend to also fly alone. With altitude comes separation. Sometimes your success will cause you to isolate yourself.

Is your why worth maybe having to take the road less traveled? If it is not, then it probably is not a big enough why. A success mindset rooted in an emotional conviction and is uncompromising.

Would the people around you respect and support successful you?  People with a success mindset evaluate the space they are in and determine whether that space and its inhabitants are benefiting their growth or hindering it.

Gain stability in your life by exercising your control over the things of your life within the realm of your influence. Stop letting other people tell you how successful you are “allowed” to be. Join Life with Ken’s Re-Alignment Boot Camp course and take back the reins of your destiny. Click to learn more.

5. Humility

The last essential to a success mindset is humility. The world systems that we live in teaches us to value another person based on what they have, social status, and position. In reality, none of that means anything.

We are all people, we all bleed the same, and we are all made up of 70% water. The only true determinant among individuals is the state of their soul and not the number of zeros in their bank account.

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Humility teaches us to be expectant of new opportunities and to be receptive of different viewpoints.

Respect should not be predicated on the potency and effectiveness of a person’s resolve. Just because a successful person worked harder than someone less successful does not mean that they are exempt from the challenges associated with being a human.

People with a success mindset look for ways to give back to those less fortunate. Successful people with a true why want to proliferate their success and do their part to make their corner of the world a better place.

The Value in Adding Value

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What if I told you, that the fastest way for you to start making more money is by making money the least essential part of what you do and why you do it?

The common denominator when it comes to successful businesses and individuals alike, is their capacity to give to others. How much you give is correlated to how much you receive.

That does not mean that by giving away all of your money, you will automatically double the amount in your bank account. That is a delusion. 

What’s real, is that all of us are given what we are appraised at. In the most simplest of terminology: when you agree to go to work to build someone else’s asset(s) for 40 hours a week; the salary that you agree to do that work for, is the appraisal that is placed on the role that you are filling. 

A director position can start at $100k a year, But a sales position starts at much less, potentially nothing. This is not because there is a world of difference between the two people in those roles. But, there is a world of difference in how those two roles are valued

Purchase the book “The Pursuit of Passion: How to Sequence your Life for Success” today and start living a life representative of who you really are!

How do you Value Yourself?

Each one of us has an evaluation, or how much we could potentially contribute. It is your responsibility to operate in a value equals money mindset as opposed to a time equals money mindset. The difference is in how you allow someone else to appraise you

Money is not real. Money is a vehicle that allows us to be productive and contributory citizens. You must come to the realization that money has no sustained intrinsic value. Before and after you become a cog in a corporate machine, you are a soul. This means that your true value is not in what you can do but rather in who you are

We add value when we live out our passionsIf you want to lead a successful life, you cannot compromise on your passions.

As a society we have allowed ourselves to be appraised by what we do rather than who we are.  When you switch from a time equals money mindset to a value equals money mindset, you start putting a higher value on your time.

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Once again this is not a free pass to be irresponsible, however, every good financial plan starts by asking: how much are you worth

If you complain about your job every day, wish you were making more money, feel stuck in your current role, or even just wish you were appreciated more for the work that you do; than it is safe to say that maybe you are not being properly valued. 

What’s your ROI?

I can relate to this because at one point I found myself being undervalued in almost every area of my life: relationally, spiritually, intellectually, and emotionally. Once I realized that was happening, I began to make drastic changes that put me in a position where I began to appraise myself for what I am truly worth and not what someone else says I am worth. 

The problem with letting others place value on you is that they will almost always underestimate you. This is no fault of your own, but rather a symptom of human nature.

People naturally look to label things so that they can better fit into their pre-established paradigm of thought. I learned to live in such a way that it is impossible for me to allow myself to be undervalued.

The best way to determine your own value is by measuring how much value you give to someone else

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Return on Investment (ROI) is a key indicator for how a business/investment is doing. Successful people treat themselves like a business. They take stock of their inventory, their investments, and assets; and determine their ROI. This ideology is applicable to every aspect of your life. The value equals money mindset puts you in a position to constantly ask yourself: how valuable am I

That does not mean “how much money do I have in the bank?”. Again, money itself is valueless. What “how valuable am I?” means is: “How am I proliferating what I have to offer?“.

Are you giving back? If so in what capacity, and/or can you do more? 

The Value of Adding Value

Look at large companies like Amazon, Microsoft, and Apple. Yes they have a large market cap; but why do you think that is the case at its core? Because they all provide a tremendous amount of value to their customers. Regardless of what you do for a living, you must be able to honestly ask yourself if whether or not you are providing tremendous value to you work; And to the people in your life

Do people know how reliable you are? Can people call on you for the big project to be completed? How trustworthy are the products and services that you offer, and does what you do perfectly align with who you are? 

When you merge your passions with your values you start living with purpose

Purposeful living is more rewarding and gratifying than all of the money in the world. When you live on purpose that means you are living the life you were meant to. When you live on purpose you cannot help but to be a servant to others. 

The golden rule is to do to others as you would have others do to youIn other words, serve the way you want to be served; and impact the lives of others the way you want your life to be impacted

This is how we add value. This is how we identify our own value.

Living with Purpose

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From a theoretical standpoint you want to add value to other’s lives because you want to become active engagers in the Law of Reciprocity (the idea that what you put out in the world comes back to you).

The practical value in adding value is that you build name recognition and familiarity. Marketing and trustworthiness is how businesses build their brand.

As a purposeful individual, you seek to add value because it gives you the room necessary to grow and develop; and to have a lasting impact in someone else’s life. 

The goal is to realize that we all are more valuable than a dollar amount associated with an hour of time. The same thing that gives a CEO value is the same thing that gives a janitor value – the fact that they are souls.

When you become effective at touching more souls, your bank account will become more effective at attracting more money. It is not about what you do, but rather why you do what you do; and who you do it for

Join Re-Alignment Boot Camp, Life with Ken’s Flagship E-Course, and learn how you can start adding more value to yourself and others. Click here to Learn more!

Blood is Not Thicker than Water

I have been going through a lot over the last couple weeks. Physically, Intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually, I have been coming up against various challenges that have been testing my resolve and convictions. 

In addition to getting back into routine with regularly creating content, I am also about to go back to school for my second master’s, I am in the process of launching what will be my fourth start up, and I am currently studying for my Project Management Professional Certification. 

My plate is becoming gradually more full as the year progresses, I am also processing the civil unrest from the unprecedented murders of men that look like me at the hands of men who do not. All of which is playing out against the back drop of Covid-19, and all the other problems associated with the pandemic

I’ll be honest I have been swamped and in need of support. At one point I caught myself spiraling out of control because of how overwhelmed I was by what I was experiencing. 

Since the pandemic has started I have been imploring you to take advantage of this opportunity. As the foundations of society started to shake I encouraged my readers on how to survive the coronavirus pandemic

I am thankful that I practice what I preach. I have been diligently sowing into my future and what I want my life to look like within the coming years. So much so that I am concerned about how bountiful the harvest has been in such a short period of time. 

In order to expand my capacity to accomplish what I need to, I sought out the comfort of my family. Turns out there was no room for me. There is something wrong with a family that does not support you in your endeavors. 

Within the last week I have found myself bewildered, perplexed, flabbergasted, troubled, cast down, and in dismay at the reality check that when this thing called life is done, all we have is ourselves. 

This sentiment is completely counter intuitive from what I thought I was taught while growing up. My mother passed away when I was five, so I never really had the chance to know motherly love. 

And while statistically, I am just as good if not better off than where I would be if my mother was still living, nothing can co-op motherly love. Unfortunately I have had to find this out the hard way. 

Just because you use super glue on something does not mean it is going to stick every time. For most of my life I have been performing for the attention of those I love. It took me a long time before I was able to do a proper appraisal of myself. And before I was able to realize my self worth and my value, I allowed myself to be influenced by the value others placed on me. 

As a creative and to my fellow creatives who are reading this, you and I know, that while we want people to praise our created content in some capacity, we cannot lean on that type of affirmation because it is fleeting and misleading. 

I feel as though I have been lied to and misled for a greater portion of my life than I care to admit. Just because we are skin folk does not mean that we are kin folk. 

Since taking ownership of my mind, and no longer conforming to the culture, I have come to discover my true identity in Christ. A lot of times people try to throw my Christian walk in my face. 

While I used to get offended and tried to defend myself on that point, I have come to realize that those same hypocrites that put my faith walk on trial do not have one iota of knowledge on what the good book even says.

 I am not in a place in life where I can allow myself to be uprooted by foolishness.

One thing I like about gardening is, that while whatever flower bud is sprouting, whatever kind of tree is flourishing on the surface, the testament to the virility of the plant is in its roots.

I am of no good if I have bad roots. I need to believe in something in this season of life, I need to have something I can hope for. And while on the surface, that may look like an accumulation of material things, when one inspects the roots they can see I am developing an authentic relationship with my father in heaven

I am looking for the same thing that everyone else is looking for whether they know it or not, Love.

I am looking for people who love me because of me. What I can do does not matter because in the grand scheme of things I am statistically more likely as a human being period, to get things wrong more often than right. Love is acknowledging that fact and saying: I do not care. My flaws should not phase you. 

The problem I have been having recently is, that my flaws do not phase my family, my freedom does. The condemnation that I have been feeling, I identify as stemming from a decrepit familial structure. 

Right now I am constantly looking for affirmations and confirmations that I am moving in the right direction. This is important to me because every step I have taken recently has been one of faith. 

I have no idea what my life is going to look like in the next two months. That’s the case for a lot of us. But because I laid a good foundation back in March 2020, I can confidently say that I am living in faith.

Faith: the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.

I have been praying for the life that I am currently living. Did I expect it to look like this? Absolutely not. But I am not going to let my goals get subverted just because another person cannot see me achieving them… 

I SEE ME achieving them.

I perpetuate success. Not because of what I have but because of who I am. I perpetuate peace because of whose I am. When you start walking in your truth, and your truth is larger than the box someone else put you in, when you finally break free people will start getting upset if for no other reason than you broke their box. 

Over the last week I have been called out of my name, asked if I was in a cult, and completely disrespected and dismissed. All by people who are supposed to be my family. Blood is NOT thicker than water. At least the stuff I come from is not. 

If you cannot see me for me you cannot see me at all

I am thankful for the people and the family members who have been loving on me in this season. They edify my hope. I get a second wind when I feel appreciated. I can overcome obstacles as long as I know someone is cheering me on. 

And I’ll be honest, finding someone who appreciates you is challenging. I have yet to find the person specifically made for me to help me run this race, but that does not mean I can just stop running. Love comes in all different forms. 

In due time my wife will provide me with an abundance of romantic love. But until then, I still need love from my family, love from my friends, and love from my God. This is literally how we are supposed to live

Long story short, I have been astonished by the lack of reciprocal love I have received and have been required to give to people who identify as my family members for the purpose of pacifying them and diminishing myself. 

I can no longer live as though I do not know who I am, I know exactly who I am. And I am not in a place where I can continually care for someone else’s grass, when mine is malnourished. 

I have literally had to start bracing myself for certain interactions because I am going to protect my convictions at all costs, especially from anyone and everyone with a weaker and less effective resolve than mine, family or otherwise. 

I have hated feeling unseen by the masses for the better portion of my life thus far. Now that I have become more resolute in my convictions,  It is absolutely fine if no one sees me. God sees me, and because he sees my due diligence in secret, he will surely reward me openly. 

Have you ever felt unsupported? If so, what has that experience been like for you, and what challenges have you faced trying to overcome this obstacle?

Join the conversation and share your perspective in the comment section below!

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A Prayer of Consecration

Dear Lord, thank you. If I stop this prayer right there it would be more than enough.

Thank you.

Thank you for who I am and where I am. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again I do not deserve to be here. Thank you for making your blessings and mercy’s known unto me. Lord I ask right now in the name of Jesus that you forgive me of any and all sins and that my heart and mind be fixated on you. Thank you for the conviction of your Holy Spirit that leads me closer to you every day. Even when there are things that I am unsure about, He is sure.

Lord I thank you for all that was revealed to me this week in my time of focusing on you. Thank you for your provisions. I will never forget what it was like to be sitting in that quick check parking lot and coming to tears over just how blessed I am and how you’ve been providing for me every step of the way. Thank you for making me more aware of you.

Thank you that I do not do the things I use to do. Thank you that in my growth and maturation I have not lost myself, but have become my own best friend. Thank you for the relationship we have. It has become one that I value even though I do not always act like it; I am glad I can call you my homie.

Thank you for this season of stretch, and that in the stretch is where my faith grows and where you make your presence known. Thank you for trusting me, even when I did not always trust you.Thank you for allowing me to stretch my faith over this past week and daring to believe.

Even though not everything I asked for came to pass it felt good just to know that if you wanted to you could have done it one, and two, you have something better on the way. I thank you for this season of triumph and victory. I thank you that you hear my prayers and are truly a prayer answerer. I thank you that you know me and lead me.

Lord I declare and receive everything you have spoken over my life and that my best days are not only ahead of me, but they are here right now. I declare that the only way to go from here is up. I declare your word over my life that says you will never leave me or forsake me.

I declare your word over my life that says no weapon formed against me shall prosper. I declare your word over my life that says all things work together for the good of those that love the Lord. As I continue to grow continue to help me love you.

Show me the true daily value in loving you. Lord I pray you continue to help me to be a good steward of what you have given me. Lord I believe you can take my little and make it much, and that you will do just that.

As this season kicks into high gear Lord, I just ask that you raise my expectations and that you help to not be complacent. You know my goals and vision for this year those spoken and unspoken, those written on paper and those that are just written in my heart; because you put them in me. Allow them to come to pass in Jesus name.

Hallelujah!

Lord thank you that I enjoy writing and that I’m good at it. Utilize this skill for your glory. Show me how to be a good steward of this gift to impact lives. Provide unto me narratives, ideas, proposals, journal entries, research articles, Op-Eds, speeches, and whatever it is you see fit. Do not allow me to let my skills or talents, this or any other one to go to waste. Put me in a position to execute to the highest standard I am capable of.

Lord I love you I thank you and am eager for what you have next for me; Your will be done in Jesus name, Amen.

A Letter to my Mother

Dear Mom,

I miss you. Funny, how can I miss someone I don’t even know? You’re such a mystery to me. You know to this day, I still don’t know your cause of death. You’re like Pink Diamond and I’m Steven Universe. It’s a cartoon mom, no I’m not too old for cartoons, you’re never too old.

People tell me stories about you, and it’s always the same narrative: your mother had a great personality, she was a hard worker, she had an infectious laugh, she was a straight shooter, and she loved you very much.

I’ll be honest, those stories have gotten old.

I want to know about your life before me. Not to put you on blast but I know you were married before, and for a period of time estranged to the family. That’s the side of you I want to know about.

I know how you presented yourself to others but who were you really? Its been hard without you, mostly because I’ve been misunderstood by others and by myself.

Its been like putting a puzzle together without all the pieces. I will say though, I’ve lived a full life. It hasn’t all been extravagant, I’ve had my struggles with depression, suicidality, and substance abuse.

I’m glad you were not around to worry about me on all my drunk and blacked out nights, or when I went to Brazil and Asia on a wing and a prayer. I’m glad you didn’t see me when I was on life support with a tube down my throat; but I wish you saw me off to prom, or when I walked across the stage to get my degree.

I wish you could have heard me speak at church. I wish I could tell you all the cool stuff I’ve done over the last 18 years. There is still so much of my life that you’re going to miss out on and I don’t know how to reconcile with that.

I guess I miss you being here.

It’s been so long since you’ve passed, and I was so young, I hardly remember anything about you. I wonder what you’d say to me now, I literally have no idea what I’m doing these days. That being said God’s been holding me down, and until we meet again,

Happy Mother’s Day mom, I just wanted to let you know, I’m doing alright,

Love you.